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ATYPICAL FATHERHOOD AND BEHAVIOR ANALYSIS: THE POWER OF
THE FATHER AS AN AGENT OF TRANSFORMATION IN ASD
Francisco Narthagnan Chaves da Silva1
Abstract: This essay explores fatherhood in the context of Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD),
addressing the painful duality between the statistics of paternal abandonment and the extraordinary
power of the father who remains and actively engages. It argues that paternal presence, when informed
by the principles of Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) and exercised in the natural environment
of the home, transcends mere support to become one of the most effective forms of therapeutic
intervention. Grounded in the literature and intertwined with the author’s personal account—a father
who discovered his own ASD diagnosis while seeking help for his children—the text argues that the
father’s conscious involvement is a critical variable that catalyzes development, strengthens the family
bond, and redenes the meaning of fatherhood itself.
Keywords: Atypical Fatherhood, Behavior Analysis, Autism Spectrum Disorder, Paternal
Involvement, Neurodiversity.
1 PhD in Psychology, Master in Education, Neuropsychologist, Behavior Analyst, Autistic Mu-
sic erapist, father of two children on the autistic spectrum.
Introduction: The Crossroads of Diagnosis
The day of a child’s diagnosis is a crossroads. For a parent, the news that their child is on
Autism Spectrum Disorder (ASD) can feel like the crumbling of a world of expectations. At that very
moment, a path forks. On the one hand, there is the road of denial and escape. On the other, there
is a steeper and more uncertain path, but one that leads to a destination of deep signicance: that of
acceptance, struggle and surrender.
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As the father of a 10-year-old boy with ASD level 3 support and a 13-year-old girl with level
1, and also as a behavior analyst, I live daily on this second road. This essay was born out of my full
conviction of the advancement and evolution of my children due to my presence and encouragement. It
is a testimony that seeks to confront the shadow of abandonment with the light of present fatherhood,
arguing that this presence, when combined with the tools of Behavior Analysis, becomes the driving
force for the development of a child with ASD.
The Shadow of Abandonment: The Statistic and the Wound
It is impossible to ignore the reality reected in alarming data. Although there is a lack of
ofcial censuses that specically cross paternal abandonment with the diagnosis of ASD, the most
referenced statistic in this debate comes from the Baresi Institute and is widely reported by the press.
According to these data, about 78% of parents separate from their mother before their child with a rare
disease or disability turns 5 years old (ESTADÃO, 2021).
This escape can be understood as a difculty in dealing with the mourning for the “idealized
child”, a wound in paternal narcissism that many cannot bear (Costa, 2008). This psychological shock
is aggravated by what Brazilian researchers such as Smeha and Cezar (2011) identify as a crisis of
traditional male identity, in which the “failure” to generate a “perfect” descendant can lead to intense
feelings of inadequacy. Dropout, therefore, is not just a statistic; It is a wound that marks the child and
overwhelms the mother, who is forced to take on all the roles in an already exhausting journey.
The Counterpoint: The Power of the Father Who Remains and Discovers Himself
In total opposition to the gure of the absent father, the power of the father who remains
emerges. This father not only remains physically; it rebuilds itself. He understands that his role is not
to mourn the son who did not come, but to learn to connect with the son who is there, in his arms. Its
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active presence becomes one of the richest environments for development.
In my case, this journey was even deeper. By immersing myself in studies to help my
children, by seeking to understand their needs and ways of seeing the world, I came across a mirror.
It was from them, in the incessant search for answers and help, that my own diagnosis of ASD came.
This discovery was not an additional burden; It was a key. Suddenly, many of my own difculties
and quirks made sense. I understood that the connection with my children was not only empathetic,
but neurobiologically shared. It transformed my parenting and my practice. The paternal mission was
redened:
“The goal was never the ‘cure’ or the search for ‘normal’ children. My goal, as a parent and
as a behavior analyst, is to ght for them to be functional, to have the autonomy to make their own
choices and to achieve a full quality of life, as close as possible to typicality. Connection and love are
the way, but their autonomy is the destination.”
Analysis of Behavior at Home: The Family as a Therapeutic Environment
Applied Behavior Analysis (ABA) is recognized for its effectiveness, but its true strength is
manifested when its principles go beyond the walls of the clinic and permeate the family routine. The
home is the main setting of the child’s life, and it is there that the skills need to make sense. This is
where the father gure becomes absolutely central.
When a parent understands the basic principles of behavior, he stops seeing challenges as
“tricks” and starts to see them as communication. He learns that the environment can be structured to
favor learning. This is the core of naturalistic approaches such as Teaching in a Natural Environment
(NET). As Hart and Risley (1975) describe in their pioneering work, language and other skills are
learned most effectively when taught in response to the child’s own initiatives and motivations. The
father’s role in the home is the purest application of this principle.
The philosophy is also central to models such as Pivot Response Training (PRT), developed
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by Koegel and Koegel (2006), which focuses on teaching “pivotal” skills – such as motivation and the
ability to respond to multiple cues – within natural play interactions. The father who plays on the oor
with his child, following his lead, is applying the best practice of behavioral science.
“Behavior Analysis gave me the ‘how,’ but my kids teach me the ‘why.’ Each game on
the oor is an opportunity to teach commands. Each tight hug after a difcult task is a differential
reinforcer. Science has given me the tools, but love, and now self-understanding, show me which one
to use and how to use it with kindness.”
The foundation of ABA in the family environment, promoted by both parents, ensures the
generalization and maintenance of skills, making the learning process an act of love and connection.
Conclusion: An Uncertain Road, but Full of Love and Self-Knowledge
Atypical fatherhood puts us in front of a fundamental choice. That of being dened by the
diagnosis or that of dening it from our actions. The decision to stay, to get involved and to learn is an
act of courage that transforms not only the child, but the father himself. In my case, this transformation
was literal: by seeking to be the best father to my children, I became more aware of myself.
The union of paternal dedication with the principles of Behavior Analysis creates a virtuous
cycle: the father, by applying effective strategies, sees the child’s progress; This progress reinforces
the father’s behavior, who becomes more condent and engaged, generating even more progress in the
child. It is proof that knowledge, when put at the service of love, is the most powerful tool that exists.
To all parents who nd themselves at this crossroads, my report is an invitation not to give
up. It is a call to trace with your children an uncertain road, but full of love. Because in the end, their
advancement and evolution will be the most eloquent testimony to the potency that exists in a parent
who decides, against all odds, to simply stay, ght, and in the process, nd himself.
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References
COSTA, N. M. de M. F. da. (2008). Being the father of a child with disabilities: implications for the
constitution of paternal identity. Dissertation (Master’s Degree in Psychology), Federal University of
Rio Grande do Norte, Natal.
ESTADÃO. Mothers of children with rare diseases suffer from paternal abandonment, overload and
prejudice. Estadão, São Paulo, 15 mai. 2021. Available at: https://brainly.ro/tema/9718542. Accessed
on: 9 ago. 2025.
HART, B., & RISLEY, T. R. (1975). Incidental teaching of language in the preschool. Journal of
Applied Behavior Analysis, 8(4), 411–420.
KOEGEL, R. L., & KOEGEL, L. K. (2006). Pivotal response treatments for autism: Communication,
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SMEHA, L. N., & CEZAR, P. K. (2011). The experience of fatherhood in the face of the child’s
chronic disease. Psychology: Theory and Research, 27(4), 523-531.
